Friday, September 11, 2009

Never Wear These Pants Again...

I will not wear pants with cuffs again.

I have this cute pair of dress pants from Banana Republic. I got them on sale so that means I really love them.

But, when I wear them I risk my life.

I don't know why or how or what makes this happen, but some kind of way, my heel catches in the cuff of my pants. It has happened before, at least twice. The first time I was working at the State Capitol, surrounded by marble. My heel caught and I tripped, just a little. It ripped a little chunk of fabric out of the cuff. No one was around, thank God.

After the first incident, I realized that I couldn't walk with my feet too close together. This worked for quite a while, I'd say about 6 months. And then (lol), I was walking with two of my colleagues back to work. This time, I was surrounded by concrete. Similar trip as before, but this time I had witnesses.

Today, however, could have very well ended my life. I realize, looking back, that I may have deserved this. I left my class about 10 minutes after it started so that I could get my computer cord from my car. I don't really need my computer for class, but it's just so boring that I CAN NOT STAND IT! My professor has already made a PSA about how he didn't like people coming into class late (which I did yesterday, BTW). I assume that means he probably doesn't like people walking in and out, but I didn't care. I can't and I won't sit through that class without alternative entertainment. So, I leave. And as I'm walking back I'm preparing myself for what I would say if he said something to me. Really ignorant sh*t, too.

And in the midst of my "wish a mutha would" moment, my pants fail me once again.

This time, my heel not only catches on a declining concrete sidewalk, but right in front of the glass windows where many of my fellow schoolmates sit and study. This was NOTHING, like the first two incidents. Oh, no. The first two times, if you hadn't been near me you probably wouldn't have noticed. THIS time, even the people inside paid attention. My heel caught and it took me SEVERAL stumbles (arm flying, leg shaking, stumbles) before I caught myself on the railing that I nearly busted my mouth into.

It was LOUD. So loud.

Everyone walking into the building with me stopped and asked me if I was okay. Even people INSIDE the building.

The moral of this story: Don't be an asshole, and NEVER wear these pants again.

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